These are my recent musings about lessons I have learned over the years. Such wisdom is attained with old age...
1. Always keep baby wipes in the car. Doesn't matter what age your kids are.
2. Always keep a quick (or ready) dessert on hand. Nice for when you have friends over last-minute.
3. Always accept a breath mint when offered.
4. Purchase good insurance. All kinds. Don't scrimp.
5. Always keep 3 items stocked in your hall/guest bathroom: air freshener, extra TP, and a plunger. Have you ever been visiting someone's house when you desperately needed one or more of these??
6. Buy the tissue with lotion in it. It's worth it.
7. Go to the dentist. It's more expensive in the long run if you don't keep up... not to mention extruciatingly painful.
8. Never, EVER ask a woman if she's pregnant. Wait for her to bring it up first, then act surprised.
9. Get college over with as fast as possible. And live with your parents as long as possible.
10. Never ask someone if their baby is a boy or girl. Here's my sneaky technique: act like you're talking to the baby and say, "You're so cute! What's your name?" Naturally the parent will answer (since babies can't talk) and you can use the name to figure out the gender. Unless the baby's name is Taylor or Bailey, then you're screwed.
10 comments:
You are so wise!! I love these!
We're learning #7&9 the hard way right now. Very sneaky and brilliant #10
Those are very excellent rules to live by.
I'm just wondering if your bathroom one may have possibly stemed from a recent event at Kim's place????? Pretty funny.
And I totally agree about the dentist, I recently had a long overdue appt. with him, and it wasn't pleasant.
I love these! I never thought of asking the baby its name. Very cool. Forgive me for not commenting more often. The google reader keeps me up to date, but I don't write as much as I should because of it. Only two weeks 'til Bekah's birthday party and seeing you guys. Yeah!!
Amy. . .you're so funny!!! Thanks for the reminder to keep my bathroom better stocked!
Yes, the dentist came the hard way for us too. We skipped the Law school years and paid way more. Now we're staying on top of it and there's no extra expenses. Oh to rewind time. . . :Sigh:
The only one I haven't broken is number 9... oh to be wise like Amy.
LOL! These are great. For some reason, I hear Eddie Murphey saying "I got a whole box of Tic Tacs in my pocket. You can have the whole thing!"
We are the same age and I still hadn't figured some of those out. You are wise.
I need to print those out and stick them to my wall. Good ones!
hi amy! its beth
I never ask a pregnant lady if shes pregnant until I am ABSOLUTELY sure she is! Until recently, when even that theory left me with a red face, so now I never ask a lady if she is pregnant EVER!!! seriously EVER!!
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